How to Feel Less Frustrated – 3 Steps to More Calm

Updated – June 13, 2025

How to Feel Less Frustrated in Life and Business

Do you ever feel stuck in a loop—trying to fix everything, but still feeling overwhelmed, agitated, or just plain worn out?

You’re not alone. Frustration is one of those quiet emotions that shows up when we’re caught between wanting things to be different and not knowing how to change them. In fact, research suggests that even small, daily frustrations—sometimes called micro-stresses—can significantly impact our emotional and physical wellbeing if ignored

In this post, I’ll share a simple way to reduce that frustration: by learning to balance two powerful levers—acceptance and action. These are the same tools I’ve used in my own life and with coaching clients who are working from home, juggling family responsibilities, and trying to build something meaningful without burning out.

Let’s take a look.

Why Frustration Happens

If you’re wondering how to feel less frustrated, it starts with understanding where frustration really comes from.

Frustration usually bubbles up when we feel powerless.

Maybe you’re doing everything “right” but still not getting the results you want. Or maybe you’re stuck trying to control something—or someone—that just won’t budge.

In either case, the tension comes from misaligned effort. We’re pushing where we need to let go, or letting go where we need to push.

And there are two mindset levers that can help us all learn how to feel less furstrated.

Lever 1 — Acceptance “It Is What It Is”

This one can be tough—especially if you’re driven, responsible, and used to solving problems. But here’s the truth:

A huge source of frustration is trying to change what you haven’t yet accepted.

This lever invites you to pause. Breathe. And ask:

“Can I fully accept this situation, this person, or even myself, exactly as it is?”

Acceptance isn’t giving up. It’s acknowledging reality without trying to resist it.

Once you stop fighting what is, you free up emotional and mental energy. You can respond more calmly. Think more clearly. And most importantly, feel less trapped.

Here are a few areas where this shows up for Tom (my typical client):

  • A spouse who doesn’t fully get the business journey
  • A quiet month of sales despite hours of effort
  • The ever-present voice of self-doubt whispering “You’re not doing enough”

When you practice acceptance, those moments don’t own you. They become part of the landscape—not obstacles in your path.

Lever 2 — Growth “Make the Change”

Once you’ve made peace with what is, you can choose what to do next.

This is where growth comes in.

The growth lever is about taking small, aligned actions to create change. It’s the conscious choice to tweak your environment, show up differently, or try something new.

Where acceptance brings peace, action brings progress.

When you pull this lever with intention, you shift from spinning in circles to gaining traction.

This might look like:

  • Saying no to a client who’s draining your energy
  • Tweaking your morning routine to protect your focus
  • Booking a call with someone who can help you move forward

In short, growth means stepping outside your comfort zone—but from a grounded place, not a panicked one.

When the Levers Are Out of Sync

Here’s where a lot of frustration kicks in: trying to pull both levers at once.

You’re trying to accept something… but still working overtime to change it.

You want to act… but deep down, you’re resisting what is.

That internal conflict creates tension, doubt, and fatigue.

I’ve seen this pattern in myself many times, especially early in my coaching journey learning how to feel less frustrated. I was trying to “fix” my business before I had even accepted the reality of where I was.

And I see it in clients too:

  • They want to attract clients, but they haven’t accepted their fear of being visible.
  • They want to change their habits, but they’re stuck in shame about past failures.
  • They want clarity, but they’re fighting the messiness that clarity often requires.

That’s why balance is key. When you accept first and act second, you move from a solid foundation—not scattered urgency.

How to Feel Less Frustrated: A Simple Action Plan

Let’s bring this down to earth. Here’s a 3-step practice you can try this week:

1. Identify the challenge.

  • Think of something that’s been bothering you. A situation, a habit, a relationship—anything that’s stealing your peace.

“Is this something I need to accept—or is it something I can change?”
Sometimes it’s both, but start with one.

2. Ask the question:

“Is this something I need to accept—or is it something I can change?”
Sometimes it’s both, but start with one.

3. Take one small step.

  • If it’s acceptance: Sit with it. Journal about it. Say, “This is how it is right now—and that’s okay.”
  • If it’s action: Pick one simple thing you can do in the next 48 hours. Then do it.

This small loop—awareness, acceptance, aligned action—can shift your mindset faster than you think.

Final Thoughts

Feeling frustrated is part of being human. But staying stuck in frustration? That’s optional.

When you learn how to feel less frustrated by working with these two levers—acceptance and growth—you start to feel more steady, more certain, and more in control of your life again.

So here’s your question to ponder:

What’s one area of your life where you’re pulling both levers at once?

Let it go. Or take the next step. But don’t do both at the same time.

Want more posts like this sent straight to your inbox?

This article was adapted from my private weekly email, Monday Mindset—a short, powerful note I send every week to help you think clearer, feel stronger, and take focused action.

Join here to start receiving it every Monday:

Until next time,

Paul 🙂

About The Author

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Paul Heron

Welcome! I’m Paul Heron, a life and mindset coach passionate about helping people live authentically and take bold steps toward their dreams. My mission is to inspire confidence and help you overcome fears and challenges with personalised coaching and actionable strategies. Ready to transform your life and achieve your goals? Let’s connect!

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