How to Take Control of Your Life
Do you ever feel like no matter how hard you try, life just won’t play along?
You plan, you hustle, you try to stay positive—but the curveballs keep coming. Deadlines shift. People disappoint. The weather ruins your weekend plans. And despite all your effort, you feel more stuck than in control.
I know that feeling well. And strangely enough, it was the Irish weather that helped shift things for me.
I was reminded of it again recently while reading Let Them by Mel Robbins. That book hit home—the idea of releasing control, letting people be who they are, and focusing on your own path. It echoed the same lesson I learned staring out at the endless grey skies of Ireland.
The Morning It Clicked
When I first moved to Ireland, I spent months complaining about the weather. The grey skies. The rain that seems to fall sideways. The sheer unpredictability of it all.
But one morning, standing at the kitchen window with a coffee in hand, I noticed something.
Everything was green. Alive. Lush in a way that felt almost magical.
The very thing I’d been cursing was the reason everything around me was thriving. That morning taught me a lesson I’ve carried into my coaching, my mindset, and my life:
You can’t control the weather. But you can choose how you show up in it and learn how to take control of your life again.
The Real Problem Isn’t the Rain
Most of us waste so much energy trying to control things that are simply out of our hands.
- Other people’s reactions
- How fast opportunities come
- Whether someone replies to that message
- The economy
- The timing of “the breakthrough”
We tell ourselves that if we could just get everything under control, we’d finally feel calm. But it’s the trying to control everything that keeps us anxious, frustrated, and spinning our wheels.
It’s like yelling at the clouds and wondering why they don’t listen.
Life Is Like the Weather
Sometimes it’s sunny. Sometimes it storms.
You don’t get to choose the forecast—but you do get to choose your response.
And here’s the thing most people miss: Learning how to take control of your life isn’t about forcing outcomes. It’s about focusing your energy on what’s truly yours to influence.
That’s what gives you power.
The more time you spend resisting reality, the less time you have to respond to it. Real confidence comes when you stop trying to win the unwinnable fights and start showing up to the ones you can influence—fully.
Taking Back Your Power: The 3-Step Shift
If you’re feeling stuck or overwhelmed right now, here’s a simple way to get back in motion.
This isn’t about magically fixing everything. It’s about getting clear on where your power actually lives—then using it. When you learn how to take control of your life by focusing on what’s truly in your hands, everything starts to shift.
1. Name Your “Weather”
What are you currently trying to control that you can’t?
- Write it down. Is it someone’s opinion of you? A job offer? The outcome of a project? Naming it helps you stop wrestling with it unconsciously.
- So often, this need for control is fear in disguise—fear of not being good enough, fear of being left behind, fear of the unknown. And fear will always have you reaching for things you can’t hold.
- Call it out.
2. Claim Your Power
What’s one small action in your control you can take today?
- Could be sending a message, going for a walk, setting a boundary, turning off your phone for an hour. It doesn’t need to be huge—it just needs to be yours.
- Small moves build momentum. And momentum builds belief.
- Every time you act on something you can influence, you reinforce a powerful message: I’m not stuck. I’m choosing to move.
3. Let It Be
What’s something you’ve been resisting that you could practice accepting instead?
- This doesn’t mean you approve of it. It just means you stop fighting reality and start living with it.
- Acceptance isn’t giving up—it’s the starting point for real change. And ironically, it’s often when we let go of forcing things that space opens up for something better to come through.
When You Stop Chasing Control, You Step Into Leadership
You don’t have to control the storm.
You just have to become the kind of person who can walk through it with clarity and calm.
That’s what leadership looks like—whether it’s in your business, your family, or your own mind. Not being unshakeable, but knowing how to find your footing, even when the ground feels uneven.
And that’s the work I do every week with coaching clients: helping people like you trade overwhelm for ownership, and fear for forward motion.
Final Thoughts
So here’s your reminder: You don’t need to control everything to feel in control.
If you’re wondering how to take control of your life, start by focusing on what’s actually yours to influence. Let the rest be weather.
What’s one thing you’re ready to stop fighting today?
If this resonated with you, you’ll love my Monday Mindset emails. It’s a weekly nudge to help you reset, refocus, and take action—with clarity, not chaos.
